How she makes me feel

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      We sat on the bench, church service had just finished, which explained the mass of people streaming around us. She sipped on the can of Pepsi I bought her. Slowly, as though the Pepsi inside was laced with invaluable gold, her hands gripping the cold can, like it was the most valuable thing she had. She looked up at me, her eyes, wide and inquisitive, but she quickly looked away as they locked with mine, her face turning a flush red. It was beautiful.

       She rested her head on my shoulder, her hair against my cheeks. I could smell it, it was a uniquely her smell, a combination of the shampoo she used and something else I couldn't quite pinpoint. My heart started beating like a jackhammer, rattling against my chest. I wonder if she could hear it, this feeling she gives me.

      She slotted her arms under mine, her fingers, immediately finding purchase and interlocking with mine. Her hands were cold, probably from the can of Pepsi she had been holding, or maybe it was anxiety? She pressed her thigh close to mine, my heart skipped a beat. It was a familiar feeling, yet why did it still make my stomach flutter? Why did it make my heart beat like this? I placed my arm around her shoulders, pulling her close, closer to me. It was comfortable, warm, and I thought, "If we could be like this forever, I shall want for nothing more..."

     She closed her eyes to rest as I listened to her breathing. I want her. I want her so badly. I want to protect her, I want to tell her she is the best, I want to tell her how amazing she is, I want to tell her how beautiful she is, I want to tell her how good she smells, I want to tell her how her smile lights up my world. But most of all, I wanted to tell her that I love her. I grasp her hand tight, afraid that she might slip away in a moment of inconsideration.


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